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Shadow of a Dream
Memory Lane


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"Hey, do you think it would be alright if I came over tonight?  Me and Nat are having problems again."


"Sure Tay, but you know how Nat will be if she finds out you were here." *Silence*


"Are your parents gonna be there?"




"Good, Ill be over in an hour."


I hung up the phone and stared at it sitting peacefully on the kitchen counter. 


I can honestly tell you that my entire life has been lived for nothing.  But then we wouldnt have a story now would we... I guess I should tell you how I met Taylor Hanson.  It isnt like most people meet.  But I do believe we were meant to meet when we did.  You could say that it all started one fateful day during my 3rd grade year.  I was on the bus, waiting to get dropped off at home, and two little scrawny white boys in the back seat kept pulling my hair and making fun of the way I was dressed (I was wearing a pink princess outfit with white sneaker type shoes) and making fun of my name.  They just wouldnt leave me alone.  The little boy sitting across the aisle next to me came over and told those little creeps to leave me alone.  Then he sat down next to me and asked my name.  I told him he would laugh and make fun of me like the others and he promised me he wouldnt.  So I told him my name was Quaker.  He smiled at me and told me that my name was the most beautiful name on the planet and that his name was Jordan Taylor Hanson.  After that extraordinary day, Taylor and I were inseparable. 


I heard a knock on the back door.  The same knock once, pause, knock two times, pause, knock once code.  I rushed to the back door and let Tay in.  He stared at me for a moment then slid through the doorway.  I passed the living room and looked at the clock on the wall, 1:35 AM...hmm, not going to get much sleep tonight.  We went to my room and laid on the floor and talked for hours.  He told me how him and Natalie kept getting into fights, and that he couldnt take it anymore, and he had to see me.  It was crazy how that woman treated him.  But I guess thats the way life goes.


After endless conversations on life love and happiness, we turned out the lights, and climbed into my bed.  We lay on my full-size bed that was against the wall, side-by-side, staring at the ceiling.  I lay on the side closest to the wall.  Ever since we were younger, I was always by the wall.  I guess for protection, but I dont know from what. 


"I cant believe it, I sighed, I mean, who wouldve known that you, Taylor Hanson, would be married and already have a son."   He sighed in return.


"Yeah, its so unreal."


"I can only imagine.  You know, to tell you the truth, I always thought that we would be the ones to get married, I mean, everyone use to say how cute we were together and that we would end up together.  But I guess like doesnt go according to plan."   I kept staring at the ceiling, and Tay kept quiet.  "I just hope that you and Nat will work out your problems soon.  At least for the sake of Ezra."  I sighed again.


"Quake, Im so sorry, I shouldve told you from the very beginning."


"Aww, come on Tay, you and I both know that me knowing from the beginning would not have been a wise decision."  We both chuckled.  "You want to know something funny?"  I asked him.


"Sure, what is it?"


"Oh, was thinking of how it use to be when I lived closer to you.  I loved it.  Especially during the middle of the night when you would come to my room and sleep with me."  Tay turned to me with a surprised look.  "Yeah, and you would think I was asleep, but I wasnt.  I would long for the nights when I would here the tap of the ladder against the wall, and the sliding of the window when you would come in.  I would hear you step to my tiny twin-sized bed and take off your shoes. I would hear the slight rustle of the covers when you would slip in.  I loved the nights you came.  I would always make sure that I was facing the wall, because only then would you wrap your arm around me and hug me tightly and sigh in my ear.  That would drive me nuts every time!  Then you would whisper softly into my ear, 'I love you Quaker, well be together always, goodnight.'  Then you would sigh again and fall asleep."  Tay scooted to lay on his side, propping himself up with his elbow, and looked at me.


"I cant believe you remember that.  No wait, I cant believe you know that!"  I looked at him and smiled.


"Baby, I know things about you that you dont even know yourself!"  We both laughed.  I turned to my side away from Tay and stared at the lava lamp on my windowsill.  I heard Tay get up and shuffle over to the bathroom.  He turned on the light and left the door open like old times.  I was mesmerized by the purple lave goo floating up and down.  I heard the toilet flush and the sound of rushing water.  Then I heard the click of the light switch.  Total darkness.  Tay stumbled his way back to the bed, lifted the covers and slipped in.  I stayed facing the wall, reminiscing old times.  Then I felt his arm wrap around me.  My heart skipped a beat.  He hugged me tightly and sighed into my ear.  It sent chills down my spine.  Then I heard the familiar whisper.


"I love you Quaker, well be together always, goodnight."  My heart almost stopped.  I had shivers funning through my entire body. 


Just like old times.  Only it was different because now we wouldnt be together always, and he didnt love only me now.  It was different, and I hated him for it.  But how can you hate your best friend?  Especially when youre in love with him...

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